The Basterds of NCIS
by Snowy Mountain
Summary: Mainly because I don't think I've seen a xover between these two yet. Takes place in the modern age with a descendant of one of the Basterds joining Gibbs' team. Predates the Pilot Episode of NCIS.
1. The SEAL

**Disclaimer:** NCIS _was created by Donald Bellisario and _Inglourious Basterds_ is by Quentin Tarantino. In terms of continuity, these events take place a few days after _JAG_, Season 8 Episode _"Meltdown"_ and prior to the _NCIS,_ Pilot Episode _"Yankee White".

* * *

**The Basterds of NCIS**

_Chapter One: _

The SEAL

* * *

"Director."

Morrow glanced sidewise and gave Gibbs a nod of acknowledgment and gestured to the seat beside him before returning his gaze to the large scale real-time video displays. Gibbs seated himself and took a sip of his coffee before Morrow spoke casually. "So … I understand that Agent Blackadder didn't work out."

Gibbs had another slow sip of his coffee before a laconic, "Nope."

Morrow graced him with a chuckle. "Getting answers out of you Jethro is like pulling teeth."

Gibbs gave a single shoulder shrug. "She's likes doing things by the book a bit too much."

"That's not always a bad thing you know."

Gibbs nodded. "Except when you can't do things precisely by the book, you don't know what to do."

Morrow pursed his lips thoughtfully as he absorbed that. "A bit too inflexible," he said at last. He fell silent. Morrow appeared to be intently watching the action of the video display of several NCIS agents taking part in a tactical operation. Then Morrow remarked, "We do have an opening for an Agent Afloat. Could give her a little seasoning."

Gibbs made a dismissive shoulder shrug. "Oh I doubt she's going to last. A month at the most, before she hands in her resignation and then she'll head back to the FBI."

"Oh?"

"Her motivation was revenge pure and simple. Finding her brother's killer. And now that he's dead, she won't last. She doesn't really want to be here."

Morrow nodded. He accepted Gibbs' pronouncement as fact. They sat in companionable silence as the arrest operation being conducted by NCIS completed itself on the video monitors. Morrow straightened and pushed himself off his chair. "Walk with me Jethro," he ordered as they strolled out of MTAC.

* * *

It was a fairly short walk to Morrow's office. To Gibbs' surprise, there was someone already seated and waiting. He rose in his crisp white uniform and nodded at them.

Gibbs didn't even blink. "Admiral."

The Judge Advocate General of the United States Navy, Admiral A.J. Chegwidden gave a rare smile. "Special Agent Gibbs. I'd like to extend my thanks for clearing Commander Rabb's name."

Jethro looked confused. "I had nothing to do with it Admiral, that was all Special Agent DiNozzo."

Chegwidden shook his head. "I disagree. You demonstrated remarkable insight, exceptional ability, and rare talent. As you always have … Gunny."

Jethro's look sharpened fractionally as he absorbed that last bit. That meant that the Admiral had read his file. Probably the classified parts as well, he realized as he relaxed. "Thank you sir," he said meaningfully.

Chegwidden glanced at Morrow and cocked an inquisitive eyebrow. Morrow gave a brief negative headshake. Chegwidden folded his arms across his chest, "I understand that Special Agent Blackadder will be leaving your team Agent Gibbs."

"You understand correctly," Gibbs said as he glanced at Morrow curiously, wondering why Chegwidden was so interested.

Morrow sat down in behind his desk and interlaced his fingers together. "The Admiral came to ask a favor of you Agent Gibbs."

_Uh oh. They're tag teaming me._ It was a tactic that Gibbs had used in the past to unbalance his suspects. He didn't care for it when it was happening to him. "What sort of favor?" Gibbs asked warily.

Chegwidden continued, "There's a former SEAL, a Navy Lieutenant who could use a job. And you have an open slot."

Gibbs frowned. SEALS were combat troops. "Does he have any sort of experience in criminal investigation or law enforcement training?" he asked at last.

Chegwidden smirked slightly. "Nope. You'll be giving him on the job training."

Gibbs scowled as he glanced at Morrow. "Sir, I don't have time to nursemaid someone until he becomes a half-decent investigator."

Chegwidden continued, "He's young, bright, and he learns fast."

Morrow added in, "And I guarantee Jethro, that Raine is anything _but_ inflexible."

There was a buzz on the intercom. Morrow touched a button and his secretary's voice came over, "Agent DiNozzo is here, sir with Lt. Raine's service jacket."

"Send him in," Morrow said.

Gibbs flicked his eyes back and forth. "What's so special about this kid that the Director of NCIS and the Judge Advocate General himself is backing him?"

"Because Raine is one of the best. And he needs to learn from the best Agent Gibbs. And that's you," Chegwidden said.

Gibbs was genuinely puzzled. "There are other Agents who could—"

"But none with your combat record and military background. I doubt Raine will respect anyone else."

"Why?"

Chegwidden paused and then, "Because I think it's wrong what the Navy is doing to him. Because he wants to serve his country Agent Gibbs … and I think it'll kill him if he can't."

"What kind of SEAL is he?"

Morrow answered with a smirk. "Tough. Hardheaded. Stubborn. Loyal. And fiercely dedicated. Just like you Jethro."

The office doors opened and Gibbs saw DiNozzo stride inside, a large manila folder tucked under his arm. He kept glancing over at Gibbs, a bit nervously.

Gibbs barred his teeth. He couldn't snarl at his superior nor the Judge Advocate General so he was left to vent his displeasure on his subordinate. What the Hell, DiNozzo was used to it. "Talk to me DiNozzo!"

Tony inserted a flash card into a terminal and a picture flashed onto the plasma screen of a handsome looking young man.

"Navy Lieutenant Aldo Raine III," Tony recited immediately. "Currently on Medical Leave, he is due to receive a General Discharge once he completes his Final Psych Evaluations."

Not a good sign. It didn't sound like they weren't sure or still appraising him. They knew. They were going to throw him out and were just waiting to finish dotting the final _i's_ and carefully crossing the _t's_ on the paperwork properly before kicking him out.

General Discharge wasn't quite like being Dishonorably Discharged, but it like barely one step up from Other Than Honorable or Bad Conduct Discharge. Meaning that the Navy wanted his ass out but they either lacked or didn't want to use a legitimate crime to hang him with.

DiNozzo continued, reading from the file. "Graduated from Basic and his scores were so good that he went straight to BUD/S which is unusual. After graduating from BUD/S, he was part of the SEAL team that was sent into Iraq. Intelligence, sabotage, and reconnaissance. They were part of the team that prepped the way for Desert Storm."

Tony looked up at Gibbs with a pained expression. "Which is when they walked into one nasty ambush. Over half of his team was killed and Raine and five other SEALS were captured. At least one SEAL died from lack of medical attention. But at least two others expired from … 'overly enthusiastic' interrogation."

Gibbs' expression hardened. "They were tortured."

"Yeah. Raine apparently escaped from his bonds and killed their captors. The other SEALS were in such bad shape that they couldn't walk so he carried them nearly 5 miles before they were picked up."

Gibbs blinked. Raine was definitely somebody not to fool around with. "Raine sounds like a candidate for the Medal of Honor. Why are they kicking him out?"

"Well, aside from the fact that the SEALS were declared illegal combatants by Iraq as they moved in before the President officially declared war; Raine was a … little too enthusiastic in dispatching his captors. He used a knife to well …" DiNozzo grimaced as he broke off, "OK, Raine's grandfather had a nickname as 'Aldo the Apache' back in World War II for his habit of scalping Nazis. Aldo followed in his grandfather's footsteps when he carved up his enemies and ritually disfigured them," DiNozzo pressed a key and a new series of grisly photographs popped up.

Gibbs raised an eyebrow at the next photos. Yeah, he could see how the Navy wouldn't want to have the PR scandal hanging over them. Politically, he was a liability that the Navy didn't want or need at this time. The last thing the Navy wanted was for this sort of thing out in the public eye's and if they went to a Full Court Martial, it would most definitely leak. Not to mention that Gibbs suspected that a few of the officers serving as the jury might not come down as harsh as the Navy needed. Worse, he might get acquitted which was even more unacceptable to the Navy. They needed Raine out and they needed it done quietly.

But Gibbs also could understand the absolute rage that the man had to have been feeling when he did it. He shrugged. Hell, he might have even helped. "Why hasn't the CIA picked him up? Sounds like they'd be salivating over a prime candidate," he asked, genuinely curious. The CIA wouldn't even blink at this little spot on his record. Hell, they might even award him bonus points for it.

Chegwidden answered. "Because Raine hates the CIA. And the CIA isn't too wild about him either. The intelligence briefing that led his team into that ambush? It was provided by the spooks at the CIA."

Gibbs pursed his lips. "Whoops."

"When he got back, the first thing he tried to do was eviscerate the CIA agent who gave the briefing in question. Damn near succeeded too. Took four men to pull him off," Chegwidden said blandly, although Gibbs saw a tiny hint of a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. "Suffice it to say, Raine would rather cut his own throat than work with the CIA."

Gibbs sighed inwardly.

But he knew what he had to do.

He stuck his hand out to DiNozzo who immediately presented the manila folder. "I'll take him on as a probationary agent and give him a shot. If he fails, he's gone," he tossed over his shoulder as he marched out, DiNozzo shadowing right behind him.

The office doors shut and Chegwidden glanced at Morrow with an amused look. "That was actually easier than I thought it would be."

* * *

**A/N:** I got this wild idea after watching _Inglourious Basterds_ on DVD and then a few days later, I saw this _NCIS_ episode where Gibbs proclaims that the "second B (in his last name) is for bastard". And I thought it would be funny to combine to the two. To join them, I had to create Aldo Raine III, who is the grandson of the infamous Aldo Raine of World War II since they couldn't fit otherwise as _NCIS_ takes place in the current day and_ Inglourious Basterds_ was back in WWII. The events that my version of Raine went through in Iraq is not based on any real world events but for dramatic license.


	2. The New Job

**Preface:** _I recently saw NCIS Episode 185 "Swan Song" and felt it appropriate it to dedicate this chapter to _Muse Watson _who portrayed a great supporting character. Goodbye Mike, I'll miss you._

* * *

**The Basterds of NCIS**

**Chapter Two: **_**The New Job**_

* * *

Exiting the Director's Office, Gibbs immediately flipped open the folder and began peering at the file. He squinted and drew it closer to his face and then further away. Nope. Still the same. "This isn't the worth the paper it's printed on DiNozzo," he barked flipping the bulging folder towards Tony who managed to grab most of it, with just a few sheets falling onto the floor.

"I want his file! His complete file! Not that blacked out, redacted, sanitized piece of crap!" Gibbs ordered. DiNozzo began carefully reassembling the whole folder and then shrugged and scooped everything up and ran to catch up.

Gibbs came to a halt at the top of the stairs and glared down at the Bull Pen. He swiveled and gave a gimlet look at DiNozzo who tracked Gibbs' line of sight. "Oh yeah. Raine is here Boss," Tony reported helpfully and giving his best charming smile.

Gibbs raised an ironic eyebrow. "Gee, thanks for telling me DiNozzo, I would never have guessed," he said flatly, the charm sliding off his armor like water off the back of a duck.

Tony nodded contritely, "Sorry Boss."

Gibbs' hand came up and whacked him on the back on the back of the head as he stepped closer and hissed. "Never apologize, DiNozzo."

Tony winced at the rebuke more than the cuff. "Right. Rule 6. It's a sign of weakness," he recited automatically.

Gibbs turned and strode down the stairs, fuming. He was more angry at himself at being played by the Director and the Judge Advocate General. _Damn, they must have seen me coming a mile away,_ he realized bitterly as Raine just 'happened' to be here right after they had briefed Gibbs about him. _ Bullcrap. They knew. They knew going in that he would cave and accept Raine._

Tony sighed and followed. Then he smirked gleefully_. At least now Gibbs had a new target other than him!_

"Why do you have that stupid grin on your face for DiNozzo?" Gibbs snarled, not even turning around.

Tony instantly wiped the smirk off his face. Before meeting Gibbs, he would have claimed that the rear position was the best in avoiding unwanted attention. Instead, he was now convinced that Gibbs had eyes on the back of his head. _And could read minds, _he thought very, very quietly hoping that the Gibbs-dar wasn't focused on him.

"Get me that file DiNozzo!"

_OK, maybe not._

* * *

Vivian Blackadder was sitting at her desk, killing time by mainly shuffling papers around and stealing curious looks at the visitor loitering by Gibbs' desk. He had spent most of the time studying the Wanted Wall but apparently exhausted himself and was now looking over the desks of the Bull Pen.

She looked up as Gibbs strode into the Bull Pen and inwardly winced at the scowl on his face. He was in a Bad Mood. As Usual. She wondered if he went to bed with a grimace on his face.

She hoped that they didn't have another case. It would be unfortunate timing. "What." Gibbs said in a flat tone of voice glaring at her. She gulped, realizing that she had been holding her gaze at him for a touch too long.

"I wanted to give you my Resignation Letter," she stated, deciding to take the Gibbs by the horns as it were. She produced a typed letter to Gibbs. "And to thank you and tell you how much I appreciate the time and patience—" she began as Gibbs took the sheet and didn't even bother to glance at it as he threw it onto one of the piles on his desk.

"Fine," Gibbs said shortly.

She blinked and tried to regroup, "Uh … if you want, I can stay for 2 weeks until you can find a replacement—"

"Weren't you leaving?" Gibbs cut her off.

Blackadder shut her mouth and produced her NCIS identification card, the NCIS badge, and her regulation Sig Sauer before laying them on the desk before grabbing her purse.

Gibbs calmly accepted the items and placed them into a desk drawer, locking it. "Anything else?" he prompted.

Blackadder shook her head. She searched for the proper words to say before coming up blank and she gave Gibbs a respectful nod. "It's been an honor," she stated formally.

"You weren't too bad," Gibbs remarked blandly. Blackadder struggled not to fall dead from shock. _That had almost been a compliment!_

Of course Gibbs ruined that by adding, "For an FBI agent."

Blackadder rolled her eyes, chuckling at the jab and gave him an actual Marine Corps salute and departed.

Tony who had been busy on his phone, requesting Raine's files was left staring at the scene in surprise. Blackadder gave him a wave, "See you Tony."

"Bye Viv," DiNozzo said quietly as she left. DiNozzo lowered the phone receiver he had been talking into and jerked his head after Blackadder. "She's leaving Boss?" he asked.

Gibbs picked up one of the waiting folders and flipped it open, his eyes scanning the pages. "You must be a detective DiNozzo," Gibbs retorted.

DiNozzo simply stared after Blackadder. "I'll miss her," he remarked longingly.

Gibbs snorted, not even looking up. "You'll get over it. Now stop staring at her ass and get back to work."

DiNozzo tore his eyes away reluctantly.

Gibbs continued scanning the typed report for a minute before he heard someone clearing their throat. He slowly lowered the file to find Aldo Raine III gazing steadily at him. "What."

"Agent Gibbs?"

"_**Special**_ Agent Gibbs," Gibbs corrected flatly.

"I was told to report to you today at 1000," Raine added with a slight Southern accent to Gibbs' ear. _Not Texan,_ he decided, _Tennessee maybe?_

"Fine. You've reported," Gibbs agreed and promptly resumed ignoring him by lifting the file folder and continued to read.

"There's a chair over there if you want to sit," Tony called out gesturing toward Blackadder's now vacant desk and then suddenly realized that Gibbs had lowered the folder and was giving him the Gibbs Stare. "Or not. Definitely not. Oh, yeah, that particular chair's uh … reserved, off-limits, in a state of eternal dibs." DiNozzo corrected himself, shaking his head in a negative fashion.

Gibbs continued to give him a beady eyed look. "I'm working on the file Boss! They—they have me on hold!" he held up the phone receiver as proof. Gibbs continued to stare at him lizard-like. "Or—or I could go down to Records in person and get it myself. Great idea Boss!" Tony slammed the phone down and leaped up and ran towards the elevator.

A faint smirk crept up onto Gibbs' face as he raised the folder and resumed reading.

* * *

Aldo Raine was wondering if he glared hard enough, if he could ignite the folder that Gibbs was reading. He doubted that the contents of it was so damn fascinating or that important.

He barely had any contact with the man but from what little he had gleaned from his observations of his treatment of his subordinates; Gibbs favored the _'my way or no way'_ style of command and wasn't above petty intimidation and bullying to keep them cowed.

He had seen quite a bit of this style of leadership before and knew that this was all just a game. A game designed to frustrate and anger him. To show Aldo Raine III just who was in charge.

He further decided that he was not going to play Special Agent Gibbs' little game.

* * *

Gibbs flipped the folder closed and placed it onto the OUT tray and picked up the next one awaiting him. Then he realized that Raine wasn't standing nearby anymore. He surveyed the Bull Pen and then smirked slightly.

That was easier than he thought. Surprising though. He thought that a SEAL would have lasted for at least an hour before running out of patience. _Guess they just don't make Squids like they used to,_ he thought to himself.

He leaned back in his chair and opened the folder when he heard a faint snore. He lowered the folder and gave the Bull Pen another look. Seeing nothing untoward, he then leaned over his desk and frowned when he noticed a pair of polished shoes sticking out in the empty cubicle across from him.

Getting up from his desk, he saw Aldo Raine III stretched out on the floor and snoring lightly. He scowled. _Huh._ Apparently, it wasn't going to be easy as he assumed.

Then he shrugged. _Definite combat vet, knows to get his sleep when he can,_ he realized before he returned to his paperwork.

* * *

Gibbs heard DiNozzo's familiar voice echoing out of the elevator. "…just like Reverend Kane from _Poltergeist 2_."

He rolled his eyes at his subordinate's fondness for cinema and glanced at his watch. _Almost an hour and a half … not bad_, he admitted to himself. DiNozzo strolled up and tossed his bag onto his desk. "Hey Boss. Got Raine's file," he presented a bulging file folder which he presented to Gibbs as though it was made out of solid gold.

Gibbs accepted it, glanced at the tabs to ensure that it was the right file and gave a sharp nod of approval. "Good work DiNozzo."

"Well…" DiNozzo grinned with his best, aw shucks tone of voice.

"If you ever get fired as an NCIS agent, you have something to fall back on," finished Gibbs.

Gibbs cracked open the folder and began quickly scanning it, flipping pages. He didn't really care about the biographical stuff, although they would probably be interesting reading later, he quickly got to the real meat of the file. Raine's military service record.

He slowed down and began carefully reviewing it. He had a number of commendations. Almost as many disciplinary charges to boot. It seemed that the man never encountered a goal that he wouldn't exceed even if he had to bend, twist, and otherwise mangle military convention, discipline, or orders.

Gibbs reread a section of his SEAL instructor who seemed to be torn between trying to simultaneously berate Raine's participation in an exercise and keep his language from being too provocative.

Gibbs smirked slightly at the sometimes ambiguous and creative report. Reading between the lines, his instructor wanted Raine as a SEAL but was trying to keep his report from being too inflammatory to ruin his chances. _Probably so he could foist Raine off on somebody more … deserving than him, _Gibbs thought amused.

* * *

Tony was surprised to feet a pair of feet obstructing the way to his desk and discovered a slumbering Raine on the floor.

"Hey, wake—" DiNozzo used his foot to lightly prod the slumbering Raine. Raine's arm snapped out, grabbed the ankle and threw it with impressive force upward, causing DiNozzo's entire body to be thrown into the air. "—UHHHHHHUUUUPPP!" DiNozzo screeched as he landed on his back, knocking the wind out of him.

Raine's hand snaked out and clamped hard on DiNozzo's windpipe and began to compress when Raine's eyes popped open and he realized who he was about to throttle. He released his grip, allowing the bug-eyed Tony to wheeze something as he reached up and massaged his neck. "Sorry 'bout that," he apologized.

Gibbs was impressed. The whole thing had taken about two seconds. Maybe a second and a half. Laconically he remarked, "Never wake a sleeping soldier DiNozzo. You'll regret it."

Tony gasped out, "No—no kidding."

* * *

Gibbs snapped the folder closed, a deep frown forming a vertical crease on his forehead. His eyes snapped around and locked onto Aldo Raine.

"With me Raine!" Gibbs snapped, jerking his head towards the elevator.

Once inside, Gibbs flipped the switch causing the elevator to shut down and darkening the lights. He glared at the ex-SEAL and ramped up his aura of menace. This kid however didn't even twitch.

He was a bit disappointed but wasn't that surprised. Raine was a SEAL after all. And they didn't choose guys who couldn't piss standing up and his little stint in Iraq certainly proved he wasn't a coward or afraid to get his hands dirty. He gave him a point in his favor and lobbed the first shot.

"So what do you have on Chegwidden? The Judge Advocate General of the Navy does not go out and pull strings for nobodies."

Raine didn't even blink. "I didn't ask him to. But the Admiral felt obligated to. He served on the same SEAL team with my father during a tour in Vietnam."

Gibbs nodded slowly. That sort of fit in with the picture he was building. He circled the man who remained standing at attention. "The reports on you say you're a loose cannon. A maverick. Even in the SEALS, you had a real habit of playing cowboy. Why? Adrenaline junkie?"

"Because I saw an opportunity and I took it."

Gibbs reared back, feigning surprise. "You saw it? _**You saw it?**_ Your years of experience and training told you that! So you ignored your superiors because: You. Saw. It."

"Yes."

"Why?" Gibbs hissed.

"Because they were wrong."

"And you are always right _**Lieutenant?**_" Gibbs barked, emphasizing his former rank to mock Raine and strike a nerve.

Raine gave a brief shoulder roll. "Never said that."

"Oh?"

Raine suddenly affixed Gibbs' gimlet gaze with one of his own and said calmly, "But I trust my gut over somebody else's judgment."

That rocked Gibbs back on his heels. Huh.

_Mike Franks was glaring at him. "You know what's your biggest problem Probie? You think you're right all the damn time! Your second biggest problem is that you're usually are but you sure are a self righteous pain in the ass about it."_

_He angrily stubbed out his cigarette before continuing with a snarl and an accusing finger, "One day Probie, one day I sure do hope that you get stuck with a pain in the ass self righteous bastard—just like you!"_

Gibbs leaned forward. "You're a soldier. And a damn fine one from your Service Record. But the question is can you be an NCIS Special Agent? Can you investigate crimes? Can you arrest people without blowing them away first?"

"If they surrender, then I have no problems with detaining them. Otherwise—" Raine gave him a smile that was somehow both very cold and very cruel, "—then they're fair game."

Gibbs nodded. Acceptable. He stepped right into Raine's face and was satisfied to see not even a flinch. "When you screw up and believe me, you _**will**_ screw up, I will be there to tell you. And I expect that you don't _**ever**_ do it again."

"Yes sir."

"Don't sir me, I work for a living!" Gibbs snarled.

"Very well … Gibbs."

"Better." Gibbs growled and flipped the elevator button causing the power to return and it rose back to the Bull Pen. "You're going to be a Probationary NCIS Field Agent. We are the premiere security, counter-intelligence, counter-terrorism, and law enforcement agency of the United States' Navy and Marine Corps. This is our job, our mission, our duty, and our responsibility. As part of the Major Case Response Team; we handle everything from investigating domestic murder cases, to international piracy, to tracking down foreign terrorist threats ashore or afloat. Your job is to listen and learn."

Gibbs stalked out and saw a ghostly image of Franks standing by his desk, a cigarette dangling in his mouth and gave him a cocky salute and a smug smirk. "_Good luck Probie. I hope you have as much fun with him as I did with you."_

_Thanks Boss,_ Gibbs returned mentally._ I probably will._


End file.
